English will be the official language of the European Union
25 replies
Paganforum_veteranOPThe European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, zay vil al be speking korekt English und not German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
".. hell you even have a fireman who rubs his balls on another mans head for three hours a week.. show some class, don't make fun of us poor Dolphins fans. :shifty:" ~ cnc66
"There is no sweeter nectar, than the misery riddled tears of Jets fans." ~ Finascious D
anlgpNew Member:lol:
"A man's suffering is similar to the behavior of gas. If a certain quantity of gas is pumped into an empty chamber, it will fill the chamber completely and evenly, no matter how big the chamber. Thus, suffering completely fills the human soul and conscious mind, no matter whether the suffering great or little. Therefore, the "size" of human suffering is absolutely relative." - Viktor Frankl
TrueDolFanNew MemberDas ist gut!
The ArbiterNew MemberMost people in the United States spell that badly... they can go to Europe and feel right at home!
Blaaarrrggghhhh!!
CrunchTimeretired_adminThis is great news for those who have trouble spelling .The spelling cops will have to be on their toes to admonish the bad spellers.
BTW this may lead to making English language the official language in the USA too.:wink2:
opfinisticNew Member"CrunchTime wrote:
This is great news for those who have trouble spelling .The spelling cops will have to be on their toes to admonish the bad spellers.
BTW this may lead to making English language the official language in the USA too.:wink2:
:pointlol:
Riiiiiight.
Frumundah FinnaticNew Member:lol:
MonstBlitz;2232016 wrote:
It wouldn't surprise me if he is retained. Jeff Ireland is the nightmare that won't end. The **** stain you cannot flush. The Herpes for which there is no cure.
NaboCaneNew MemberAs it should be.
You can't argue against the lingua franca of the entire world...and if you do, you have to do it in English.
syborgNew Member"CrunchTime wrote:
This is great news for those who have trouble spelling .The spelling cops will have to be on their toes to admonish the bad spellers.
BTW this may lead to making English language the official language in the USA too.:wink2:
Only if you can start to spell it correctly. . Neighbour not neighbor; colour not color etc :couch:
Ultraforum_veteranthe only thing that kills me is the pronunciation of aluminum :lol:
opfinisticNew Member"syborg wrote:
Only if you can start to spell it correctly. . Neighbour not neighbor; colour not color etc :couch:
I refuse to take a leak in a loo.
Frumundah FinnaticNew Member"opfinistic wrote:
I refuse to take a leak in a loo.
I also refuse to smoke a ***.
MonstBlitz;2232016 wrote:
It wouldn't surprise me if he is retained. Jeff Ireland is the nightmare that won't end. The **** stain you cannot flush. The Herpes for which there is no cure.
opfinisticNew Member"Frumundah Finnatic wrote:
I also refuse to smoke a ***.
Welcome back to our team!
syborgNew Member"opfinistic wrote:
I refuse to take a leak in a loo.
I guess 'taking a leak in the loo' is better than taking a wizz in the john :tongue2:
opfinisticNew Member"syborg wrote:
I guess 'taking a leak in the loo' is better than taking a wizz in the john :tongue2:
Go queue up for a pint and bugger off.
I'm doing alright?
syborgNew Member"Frumundah Finnatic wrote:
I also refuse to smoke a ***.
The f'ag reference comes from burning a cigarette as you would burn kindling/firewood and progressed to g'ay man because sodomites and such were burned for their crimes against nature and all that, The *** to mean cigarette origin is obviously due to burning a cigarette like one might burn kindling as I mentioned earlier. .
syborgNew Member"opfinistic wrote:
Go queue up for a pint and bugger off.
I'm doing alright?
lol. . your doing great. . now just write the date the right way around and you could prob get away with it. .:up:
opfinisticNew Member"syborg wrote:
lol. . your doing great. . now just write the date the right way around and you could prob get away with it. .:up:
MCMXLVIII Ah crap I forget how you blokes do it. ;)
texanphinaticforum_veteran"opfinistic wrote:
MCMXLVIII Ah crap I forget how you blokes do it. ;)
Its "Ah bloody 'ell", not ah crap. :up:
Frumundah FinnaticNew MemberOnly if you can start to spell it correctly. . Neighbour not neighbor; colour not color etc
Dont be such a grammour nazi:tongue2:
MonstBlitz;2232016 wrote:
It wouldn't surprise me if he is retained. Jeff Ireland is the nightmare that won't end. The **** stain you cannot flush. The Herpes for which there is no cure.
syborgNew Member"opfinistic wrote:
MCMXLVIII Ah crap I forget how you blokes do it. ;)
Well now Im on my 6th can of this 5% lager: 
I cant reemember how we do the date either. . lol :up:
opfinisticNew Member"texanphinatic wrote:
Its "Ah bloody 'ell", not ah crap. :up:
Ah bloody 'ell, I have a Texan teaching me the 'Queen's language'!
syborgNew Member"Frumundah Finnatic wrote:
Dont be such a grammour nazi:tongue2:
lol. . :lol:
baboo72New MemberGuys just remember to drop the H at the begining of every word and you'll be alright then you'll be avin a larf!
Thanks In_Flames for my amazing sig!
dolfan06New Member"opfinistic wrote:
I refuse to take a leak in a loo.
you think a loo is bad, ya ought to go to china. their friggin toilets are a hole in the floor with a half cup on one side. if you aren't limber and can't squat i guess you make a game out of it and try to hit the hole.:sad:
>@))))%> GO DOLPHINS!
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