The Rules of Food:

The Correct Way to eat a Snickers

47. A side of vagina will make any dish better. Liver and onions, ehew... liver and onions with a side of vagina, mmmmm....

48. If you can eat a corn dog in one bite, leave your number below. Unless ur a dood. not cool.

"Firesole wrote:

My one and only food rule:

Don't let anyone tell you what or how to eat your food! Just enjoy it! I don't a guy from Philly to tell me that his cheese steak is better. I don't need a guy from Memphis to tell me what good bbq is.

49. anyone who says they don't need a guy from philly to tell them what a good cheesesteak is they obviously have not had a philly cheesesteak otherwise they wouldn't have made this rule.

"GISH wrote:

48. If you can eat a corn dog in one bite, leave your number below. Unless ur a dood. not cool.

For Gish he'll take your number if you can eat a piece of rice in one bite. Dood or not.

Rule 49: If you can pull off the trifecta(food, tv and sex ala George Costanza) Than you are a god.

Rule 50: "Diet" food is for *******.

"lmeister3 wrote:

40) **** Miracle Whip

Rule 41 Addendum: **** Mayo in all its forms.

"Frumundah Finnatic wrote:

Rule 49: If you can pull off the trifecta(food, tv and sex ala George Costanza) Than you are a god.

Rule 50: "Diet" food is for *******.

Rule 41 Addendum: **** Mayo in all its forms.

rule 51. if anyone invokes rule 41 addendum they seriously need to ask themselves how much they like food.

Rule number 1 in Ron's cook book. You haven't lived until you've eaten something you've killed. To hell with that store bought ****!

BTW Kraft's Real Mayo for your French Fries is food for the Gods and Vanalla Wafers in milk is breakfast food!

Rule 52: If you order any cut of meat cooked "well done"...you do not know how to eat.

"gafinfan wrote:

Rule number 1 in Ron's cook book. You haven't lived until you've eaten something you've killed. To hell with that store bought ****!

BTW Kraft's Real Mayo for your French Fries is food for the Gods and Vanalla Wafers in milk is breakfast food!

:knucks::hi5:

"Section126 wrote:

Rule 52: If you order any cut of meat cooked "well done"...you do not know how to eat.

This! I tell 'em knock the horns off, wipe it's ass and throw it on the plate.

"tinytown50 wrote:

47. A side of vagina will make any dish better. Liver and onions, ehew... liver and onions with a side of vagina, mmmmm....

i hope you mean this in the manner i think you do and you're not going on about some hannibal lecter dining experience. The vagina is attached to a living breathing woman, yes?

"adamprez2003 wrote:

i hope you mean this in the manner i think you do and you're not going on about some hannibal lecter dining experience. The vagina is attached to a living breathing woman, yes?

Actually sheep vagina.

or the 'West Virginia Taco' as it more commonly referred to.

i ran out of mayo at my house last night, but really wanted some with my sandwich, so i made my own mayo

whats the ruling on that?

"maynard wrote:

i ran out of mayo at my house last night, but really wanted some with my sandwich, so i made my own mayo

whats the ruling on that?

:ban: if it involved porno and you put it on your sandwhich

"maynard wrote:

i ran out of mayo at my house last night, but really wanted some with my sandwich, so i made my own mayo

whats the ruling on that?

Using egg whites and oil I hope.

"adamprez2003 wrote:

:ban: if it involved porno and you put it on your sandwhich

One of the two is ok, just not both.

If you use lighter fluid to start your coals you're doing it wrong.

And should have your man card revoked.

"gunn34 wrote:

42.) It's called grilling if you do it with gas or under 5 hours. Real men BBQ for 5-6 hours minimum with wood and/or Charcoal.

I object to this. Grilling is direct over a flame or slightly to the side indirect. BBQ can be done in less than 5-6 hours. Back ribs are done in 3-4 hours depending on conditions, and this is almost falling off the bone. Which by the way, is another rule. if you want FOTB ribs boil them. I cook mine to be tender yet still have some texture and bite to them.

Spares take longer, beef ribs, brisket and pulled pork all much longer.

Originally Posted by adamprez2003
i hope you mean this in the manner i think you do and you're not going on about some hannibal lecter dining experience. The vagina is attached to a living breathing woman, yes? Today 09:28 AM

I was just trying to show how a lowly dish such as liver and onions can be elevated to culinary delight when you add a simple side of vagina. Not cooked, and still alive and breating.

Here is another example. Brussle sprouts. The hell with brussel sprouts, but add a side of vagina and I'm game!

Originally Posted by opfinistic
Actually sheep vagina. or the 'West Virginia Taco' as it more commonly referred to.

There is much better things a sheep vagina can be used for other than eating to a enterprising, imaginative, and motivated hillbilly. A 'West Virginia Taco' I thought was comprised of a slow moving sister or a retarded cousin that could keep a secret.

"opfinistic wrote:

Using egg whites and oil I hope.

You cannot make mayo with just egg whites, it's a sabayon based sauce and needs egg yolks. I suppose you could make something with egg whites and oil, but it aint gonna be mayonnaise.

Here's a light whole egg mayo we use at work.

- 4 whole eggs
- similar volume of white balsamic vinegar (NB amount of vinegar required depends on size of eggs)
- 8-10 cloves of confit or roasted garlic (do not use raw garlic)
Blitz in a blender or food processor
- 2 pints good food quality oil.
Slowly drizzle in whilst the machine is going, stop when you reach desired consistency.
If the mayo is too thick thin it with some hot water.
- Season with salt and pepper.

To make a richer version use 8 egg yolks instead of 4 whole eggs.

"Frumundah Finnatic wrote:

Rule 50: "Diet" food is for *******.

Rule 41 Addendum: **** Mayo in all its forms.

So very wrong about the Mayo. Anything that comes from a jar or plastic tube is shizenhausen but real mayo is damn good on its own and an excellent base for additional flavourings.

53: French fries have to be cooked in goose fat or duck fat. Anything else is a pale imitation copy.

Rule 54: If you honestly think KFC is better than Church's, Popeyes or Bojangles then you are better off sterilized.

Never had bojangles, don't like Churchs but dear god Popeyes is the bizness!

Rule #55. Don't order filet mignon unless you have a vagina and I mean have one, NOT ON THE SIDE!