The 10 Dumbest Fanbases in America

ToddPhin · Jan 24, 2014

An interesting and fun read when you have the time.

#1. Alabama
The Alabama fan base is a fractious mix of two distinct groups who can't really stand each other.
At the top of the list is the 10-15% of the fan base that could actually be admitted to Alabama or attended the school.
This group hates most of the rest of the Alabama fan base with a passionate fury.
Right now they are reading this column and silently nodding.
The other 85% of Bama fans are incapable of coherent thought and have a deep-seated insecurity about all things in life. Alabama football comprises, and this is not an exaggeration, 99% of their self esteem.
This group of Alabama fans resents those who actually attended the school and calls them, "elitists." (To be an "elitist" in Alabama you have to graduate high school, avoid having kids until you're 22, and shop at Target instead of Wal-Mart. Seriously, that's an Alabama elitist.). Auburn fans, a distinct minority in the state, are really nothing like Alabama fans. That's because by and large Auburn fans are associated in some way with Auburn. 95% of the idiots in Alabama root for the Crimson Tide.

What's the dumbest stereotypical Bama fan like in his element?
He's a 38 year old grandfather and he owns fourteen shirts, thirteen of which have to do with Alabama football's mythical national titles.
An important aspect of his life is that everyone must know that Alabama is his favorite team at every moment of his life. His truck, his trailer, his clothing, his animals, his arm, his parole papers -- all of them must include a reference to his Alabama fandom.
To not do this would be unacceptable.
When he was 19 he got a 14 year old pregnant, married her, and then got another, different, 14 year old pregnant and subsequently got divorced. Then he got a third 14 year old pregnant and there was only one appropriate way to celebrate this accomplishment while simultaneously combining it with his love for Bama football.
His tailgate was his canvas.

...follow link to continue reading
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http://www.outkickthecoverage.com/t...ses-in-america-1-the-alabama-crimson-tide.php

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