If you had the ability to purchase a team, what team would you buy? Would it be your favorite team or would it be a team that you want to work with and build up the current roster? What changes would you make?
I would probably steer toward purchasing the team I grew up watching. Credibility with the fanbase is important in the business model I think. I would institute a lot of policies that I might get criticized for though.
If I'm being entirely honest, I'd of course buy the Miami Dolphins, and be a worse owner than Al Davis with my inability to keep my nose out of football business. I'd make sure and hire a GM and coach who would make QB #1 priority and not an afterthought. Then I would do my best to stay out of things.
I'd buy the Phins. Of course the Uniform design would have to change. My staff would be young. I'd have some nose in football business but not nearly Al Davis or Jerry Jones level.
If I had the money I would buy 3 teams, NE Pats, NY Jets, and Buffalo Bills, and make sure the Dolphins won the division every year.
I think it is always preferable to buy the team you follow, but objectively, I am not sure if I could make good decisions on sound business judgement. Purchasing a team like say, the Vikings. A team I have no attachment to in any fashion, would be interesting.
I'd purchase the Browns. Then pawn it off, and use the money to get a 1988 Chrysler TC; hopefully one previously owned by Jon Voight.
The Dolphins, of course. I'd start immediately on building a new stadium IN MIAMI. I'd hire the best football mind I could find who had a compatible view with mine on football, make him VP and let him build the largest, finest and most extensive Personnel staff in the business, no expense spared—starting with a GM with a strong personnel track record. I'd let him head the search for the next Don Shula, but I'd have final say, and whoever it was would have to meet my expectations as far as Defensive and Offensive philosophies, and in choosing Coordinators and other coaching staff. The one thing I would ensure is that, top to bottom, everyone is 100%, crystal-clear on the overall direction we would always take. There would never be a Ted Ginn or a Pat White or ANY Receiver from USC drafted by my team. There would be a system based on a philosophy, and there would be no deviations from prototypes, playing styles or player character, period. No one can guarantee championships, but I would guarantee to fans that we'd always compete for one, every season. And I'd back it up by promising to knock 20% off ticket prices for any season following a losing one for existing season ticket holders. And not out of my pocket, but out of the pockets of the entire personnel and coaching staffs. Accountability—in spades!
I'd probably buy the Arizona Cardinals and innovate like a mofo. I'd have fans voting on the internet on who to draft. I'd have giant holographic gorillas going ape-sheit(apensheizer?) after every sack. I'd lo-jack the field and place microscopic transmitters in the ball for real-time spots (don't know why they don't already). I'd coordinate with local homeless shelters, giving them free tickets and rides to the games. I'd have medical marijuana dispensaries in the stadium. I would crucify bankers guilty of drug money laundering at halftime...yada, yada, yada But the most important thing I would do is instill a sense of healthy competition and sportsmanship...
I'd buy the Jets. The I'd pay back what we owe to the Giants for beating the Pats and move the Jets to Iowa.
If I had the money to buy a team, I wouldn't. I'd just buy a luxury box in Dolphins stadium for life, and invite Ozzy, DJ and Todd to every game, along with about a dozen porno actresses. We'd need to tivo the games though because we may miss seeing a few plays.
You mean North Korea right? No need for Iowa to suffer with a toesucking coach and a bunch of classless tools What? I cant get an invite homey? I thought we was cool! Of course I'd buy the Dolphins. - I think I'd be a menace to society with my need to be involved in personnel decisions and drafting. - Being from New York I am naturally outspoken so I would probably annoy every other owner with my suggestions and trash talk. - I would probably bring in a handful of ThePhins members to watch film with and break down players. They would be very separate form our scouting department but from time to time I might make a recommendation based on what we viewed. - I would collect picks in a manner that made New England jealous. - I would have a designated cage for visiting Jets fans outside the stadium where they would stay. They can attend the game...theyre just watching it from a cage over the visiting endzone suspended 1000 feet in the air with no bathroom and the venders in there are charging $100 for a bottle of water or hot dog - Bills and Pats fans just get duct taped so they cant talk smack. They also cant use the facilities so we can all point and laugh. - Free agency hits and Im bringing in the top flight talent if its not an attitude problem like a Haynesworth. DeAngelo Williams AND Ahmad Bradshaw would be ours this ffseason if they were both free agents. Manny Lawson, Nmandi Asomugha, Santonio Holmes and Carolina Steve Smith (via trade) as well. - Im putting this team in Dynasty mode like in Madden..not gonna be happy til Im winning every game 70-3
You mean like "No Whores!"? I thought it was a Chrysler Lebaron. Ignoring the Phins and assuming I was just an impartial observer, I think the Seattle Seahawks would be an interesting franchise to look into. Cool city that has become quite the sports town, even with the loss of the Sonics. The Sounders regularly draw crowds that sound a lot like European crowds, with songs and chants going the entire game. You're also in a horribly ****ty division. Sell the farm for Andrew Luck and then spend the next three years building the team around him. Work out a deal with Starbucks and Microsoft for sponsorship. Sign Pearl Jam to play halftimes.
Oh hey, thanks. Smart; Seattle is a hell of a sports town and a great place to live. My town...that created all the bass sound... Oh, wait... Yes to the water park. Hell yes.
As much as I love the Dolphins, I'd buy the Pittsburgh Steelers. Rooney and their family is what class is all about.
