NationalEnquirer.com -- What wears black and grey, looks like Joan River's nether regions, and has been buried six feet under? Apparently Al Davis! A source within the Oakland Raiders organization has confirmed a recent rumor that the longtime Raiders owner has been dead for just under three years. According to the source, the Raiders boss for over four decades passed away shortly after the 2007 NFL Draft. Just days after, his body was found at his home in Oakland with a bottle of hand lotion, a tissue, and the very jersey given to first round draft pick, JaMarcus Russell. Family members say that his timely death was covered up to minimize scrutiny of the organization. Within hours of outright confirming the allegations, the team was sold for $1.05 to Will Hess, the new self-proclaimed GM and aspiring pimp. Rumor has it that the team name will soon be changed to the Oakland "Panty Raiders". More to follow! For all the details and to learn who she wants to spend her new life with pick up the new ENQUIRER on sale!
No wonder Tom Cable has been waiting so long for his meeting with Al Davis... oh and: "Family members say that his timely death was covered up to minimize scrutiny of the organization." is the funniest thing I've read all day...
Finally, an Oakland sports organization I can respect... ...wait a minute! This is fake isn't it? D'oh!
