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Are farts still funny?

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by McLovin, Aug 20, 2013.

Are farts still funny?

  1. Yes

    37 vote(s)
    60.7%
  2. No

    5 vote(s)
    8.2%
  3. I hate the Jets

    19 vote(s)
    31.1%
  1. Rocky Raccoon

    Rocky Raccoon Greasepaint Ghost Staff Member

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    Yeah Boik, we're trying to have a mature conversation here and you're talking about belching? Take that nonsense to twitter.
     
  2. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    Recognize

    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     
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  3. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I was drawing an analogy. Tough crowd :no:
     
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  4. fins4o8

    fins4o8 Mac FTW!

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    I like to give my girl a Dutch Oven when she's asleep but it's getting old. I need new tricks, can you help out a fellow phins fan? You guys got any good fart moves? All the ones I've read in this thread, I've done & been on the receiving end. And, yes farts are extremely funny especially when you do it to others.
     
  5. Colorado Dolfan

    Colorado Dolfan ...dirty drownin' man?

    Best ammo for farts: Deviled eggs and coffee.

    :thumbsup:
     
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  6. Ohio Fanatic

    Ohio Fanatic Twuaddle or bust Club Member

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    not for me, being lactose intolerant, I find the combination of a big milkshake plus 2 bean burritos from Taco Bell gives me the best ammo.
    I can also substitute onion rings and a bacon double cheeseburger for the burritos.
     
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  7. Claymore95

    Claymore95 Working on it... Club Member

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    My mother once did one of those in a shop, she started running up the aisle to get away from it and thus the gun kept on firing all the way up the aisle. I was bent double over a display with tears of laughter running down my eyes, so much so that a shop assistant came over and asked me if I was ok. I couldn't answer for laughing, but the change of look on her face from concern to one of disgust soon told me she now knew what I was laughing at.
     
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  8. cdz12250

    cdz12250 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I once cleared a supermarket checkout line with a quintessentially putrid-smelling SBD. The people moved away to other lines. There I stood, in guilty solitude.
     
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  9. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Shoot, thats a damn fine strategy sir. I think I will gas up before my next run to the supermarket. Thats one way to shorten lines.
     
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  10. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    I bet it won't work at Wal-Mart.
     
  11. SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    "Smells like supper!"
     
  12. SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    My wife absolutely LOVES making buffalo chicken dip. It is so fantastic. Too bad there is a con to every pro.

    I **** like a water cannon from a WW2 sub for days afterwards. I will **** and eat at the same time cause, yolo.

    It tastes amazing (the dip), and the farts that press from out of my rectum are ones that could gag a sanitation worker.

    My wife will reluctantly be making some up this weekend......everyone buy stock in febreeze now.
     
  13. finyank13

    finyank13 Reality Check

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    My brizz often tells me how she was duped in this whole relationship thing, because when we first started dating I wouldn't fart or burp...and now I am a disgusting animal....she called it Phase 1 love back then and now we are in Phase whatever 4, 5...

    Basically that is her response everytime I fart....."Phase 1"
     
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  14. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Actually everything works at walmart....for minimum wage. They'd package it and sell it if they could. :lol:
     
  15. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

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    Dog farts are awesome.
     
  16. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Not when poop comes out and you have to clean it up :no:
     
  17. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    When poop comes out, the dog has moved beyond the fart and into pooping, therefore, it is no longer a dog fart.

    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     
  18. Fishweiser

    Fishweiser New Member

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    Not my story, but a good one...

    Back when one of my friends started dating his future fiance, they had already been together for a couple of months when one morning, while still in bed, he told her: " You know? Weve slept together, Ive laughed with you, Ive told you my life's story's etc,. After all this time with you there's only one thing left that I still haven't done...." She asked " whats that?" ...he then was like, "how would you feel if I farted in front of you?" She laughed and said "let her rip!!" Meanwhile, during their conversation in bed, neither were aware of her new kitten which was sound sleep right behind his ***. He lets a huge one go, and she sees a startled kitten leap 3 feet straight up in the air from behind his ***. She said it looked like he shat up a kitten. They both love to tell that story and will laugh hysterically any time they tell it. LOL
     
  19. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

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    yes. You gotta take the dutch oven to a new level to reach the same high. Next time, without waking her, very gently reverse-straddle her face with your arse a few inches from her nose, then tickle the sh** out of her. Need to time it so you gas her right as her face smacks into your bum.
     
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  20. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    Even better, add baby powder for a visual aspect.

    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     
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  21. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

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    What's Phase 5, seeing what your normal underwear look like?.... Finding the hidden pee bottle you forget to empty after the game?
     
  22. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

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    .... or coat your rim with hershey's syrup..... then be like, "holy sh** you should see your face!!"
     
  23. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    Nutella

    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     
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  24. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Seek help but thats hilarious.
     
  25. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

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    If she truly loves you, you can get away with it the first time.
     
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  26. MonstBlitz

    MonstBlitz Nobody's Fart Catcher

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    Ok, whose the stiff that

    a) Doesn't think farts are funny

    AND

    b) doesn't think the Jets suck?

    Whoever he/she should be immediately banned.
     
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  27. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    Lucky.

    He admitted it was him because he's still mad I won't give him any.

    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     
  28. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    45/10 would bang
     
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  29. Boik14

    Boik14 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I was just thinking....who else here has cropdusted a staircase at a mall? I recommend trying it at some point....
     
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  30. adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    [video=youtube;vb97nlbJD0Q]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vb97nlbJD0Q[/video]
     
  31. smahtaz

    smahtaz Pimpin Ain't Easy

    My **** is in the punch.
     
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  32. adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    I present to you the one arm fiddle player
     
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  33. Section126

    Section126 We are better than you. Luxury Box

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    One of the most underrated movies of all-time.
     
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  34. Section126

    Section126 We are better than you. Luxury Box

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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oq3GHO-5laA

    "I'm gonna tell you Buttholes something......

    THIS **** IS WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY OUT OF LINE....

    You squirrels better have some nuts in your mouth...or YOU'RE GOING DOWNTOWN."
     
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  35. Section126

    Section126 We are better than you. Luxury Box

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    [video=youtube;3B5Jnho8dTc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3B5Jnho8dTc[/video]
     
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  36. The_Dark_Knight

    The_Dark_Knight Defender of the Truth

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    I forgot all about this video...

    [video=youtube;qYSPAraTWmo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYSPAraTWmo&feature=player_detailpage[/video]

    :lol:
     
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  37. MonstBlitz

    MonstBlitz Nobody's Fart Catcher

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    I once left a classroom to use the bathroom and a friend once took my cell phone I had left at the table and farted on the mouthpiece. He then called me during our lunch break and asked my how his *** tasted.

    Tell me that's not funny.
     
  38. Frumundah Finnatic

    Frumundah Finnatic U Mad Miami?

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    My Lab farts exactly like a human. Loud as hell. Which is fun when you are at the vet, all of a sudden your dog lets one go and it gets deathly quiet.
    The bad thing is that dog farts linger for a good 5 minutes.
     
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  39. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

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    Yours would too if you ate dog food all the time.
     
  40. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

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    So if I eat people food all the time, should mine linger?

    I think this post was animal racism at its best.


    Sent from my TB12-DSL using Tapatalk 2, one handed.
     

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