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I'm glad I'm not a --------- fan!

Discussion in 'Miami Dolphins Forum' started by Paul 13, Dec 29, 2009.

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  1. Dec 29, 2009 #1
    Paul 13

    Paul 13 Chaotic Neutral & Unstable Genius Staff Member

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    That's right boys and girls, it's time to play....

    I'm glad I'm not a ______ fan...

    Looking around the NFL this season, here's my list in no particular order...

    -I'm glad I'm not a Raiders fan. Their coach just came out and said in no uncertain words, if it weren't for Jamarcus Russell, they'd be playoff bound. OUCH! They have the Crypt Keeper, Al Davis, still calling the shots. Trading away future first round pick on Richard Seymour, who will likely not be back next year. OUCH! And then there's that whole Heyward-Bey draft pick.... OUCH! Not to mention that Mr Davis still believes he has the NFL rights to the City of Los Angeles. Ummm, Mr Davis, you left Los Angeles over a decade ago.

    -I'm glad I'm not a Patriots' fan. That's right. I don't care that they won the AFC East. They are rebuilding, regressing and I have to wonder how much they miss Scott Pioli. Their future looks very bleak and I look forward to the day they finish fourth in the division. Three years from now, it will happen.

    -I'm glad I'm not a Jets' fan. Umm, what stadium do they play in again? Giants' Stadium?? When your spokesman appears in his drunken slumber on MNF hitting on the least hottest sideline reporter in the game and it's the highlight of the decade, fandom is over as you know it. Have no fear, the Sanchize is here. Let me know when he has a good game in bad weather.

    -I'm glad I'm not a Bills' fan. Do I really have to explain why? Toronto, HELLO!?!

    -I'm glad I'm not a Browns' fan. Two years ago they had the opportunity to trade one of their "premier" quarterbacks. Now they can't even give one away. Not only are they stuck with the Mangenius, but Mike Holmgren is coming to town to be the GM/President??? Didn't he have his personnel decision making label removed while he was with the Seahawks?

    -I'm glad I'm not a Redskins' fan. You know, there is nothing wrong with your owner wanting to win and spending whatever it takes to get there. The problem is that he's too involved in HOW that money should be spent. There's a slight chance they'll be able to land Mike Shanahan. But I really don't see that working as Shanahan will want full autonomy. And we all know Snyder isn't going to give it to him.

    -I'm glad I'm not a Vikings' fan. Even though Brett Favre has led that team to a solid record this season, things have started to unravel. Disagreement with Childress being number one. The Vikings have all of a sudden lost three out of their last four. Philadelphia, with a win on Sunday, will take the #2 seed away from them. Which means, Brett Favre won't get any time off to rest up as one would expect he'd need. And you just know as soon as the season ends up there, #4 will be asked about coming back next year to which he'll reply "ask me again next August." It should also come as no surprise that the Vikings struggles coincide with their loss of MLB EJ Henderson.

    -I'm glad I'm not a Seahawks' fan. Those unis... oofa! Are they really going to go into 2010 with Matt Hasselbeck as their starting qb again? TJ Who's Your Momma said the thing that pushed him over the edge in signing with the team (besides all the cash they were offering guaranteed) was the way they landed him on that sea plane right next to the team facility. Maybe they should move the team to Alaska so he can really be impressed on a daily basis with the primitive transportation. They can dress up Olindo Mare as an Eskimo and have him shuttle would be free agents to and from the practice facility in one of these:

    [​IMG]

    and last but certainly not least... I'm glad I'm not a Rams' fan! They've won ONE game so far this season. I'm fairly certain Marc Bulger is still one of the top five paid quarterbacks in the league. And here's a quick look at their injury list:

    Brooks Foster Sep 2, 2009 Injured Reserve Ankle
    Adam Carriker Sep 5, 2009 Injured Reserve Shoulder
    Eric Bassey Sep 6, 2009 Injured Reserve Knee
    Laurent Robinson Sep 30, 2009 Injured Reserve Fibula
    Gary Gibson Oct 12, 2009 Injured Reserve Foot/ankle
    Chris Massey Oct 26, 2009 Injured Reserve Knee
    Bradley Fletcher Oct 28, 2009 Injured Reserve Right knee
    Keenan Burton Nov 16, 2009 Injured Reserve Torn patellar tendon
    C.J. Ah You Nov 24, 2009 Injured Reserve Knee
    Oshiomogho Atogwe Dec 9, 2009 Injured Reserve Dislocated right shoulder
    Jacob Bell Dec 15, 2009 Injured Reserve Hamstring
    Daniel Fells Dec 21, 2009 Injured Reserve Knee, fractured thigh bone
    Steven Jackson Dec 25, 2009 Questionable Back
    Leonard Little Dec 25, 2009 Out Knee
    Jason Smith Dec 25, 2009 Out Concussion
    Quincy Butler Dec 25, 2009 Out Knee
    Marc Bulger Dec 27, 2009 Injured Reserve Knee

    Poor Steven Jackson. Look on the bright side St. Louis. You'll have first crack at Ndamukong Suh. Problem is, your front office will likely pass up the most dominant defensive player to come out in a long time for what? Tim Tebow??

    Ah yes. See it's not so bad being a Dolfan. Sure there are other teams who are better than us THIS season. But the future is bright, unlike the teams mentioned above.

    Until next time.
     
    Jacob The Dane, dolfan22, phineas64 and 5 others like this.
  2. Dec 29, 2009 #2
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    im glad im not a paul13 fan. he makes ****ty threads.
     
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  3. Dec 29, 2009 #3
    Paul 13

    Paul 13 Chaotic Neutral & Unstable Genius Staff Member

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    Thanks for keeping it bumped! :knucks:
     
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  4. Dec 29, 2009 #4
    dolfan7171

    dolfan7171 Well-Known Member

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    I love it. You pretty much said it all right there. Go Dolphins!!!!
     
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  5. Dec 29, 2009 #5
    Silverphin

    Silverphin Well-Known Member

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    I'm glad I'm not a Camera.... er..... Patriots fan.
     
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  6. Dec 29, 2009 #6
    brandon27

    brandon27 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I'll play along...

    Im glad I'm not a browns fan... I mean what really is there to be excited about there? I guess with Holmgren taking over, it might be slowly turning around for them.

    Also, Glad im not a lions fan... it's self explanatory. Its still going to take quite a while to turn that team around.

    Also... and most importantly I'm glad I'm not a Jets fan... thats self explanatory. I'd never want to be associated with that... Also glad I'm not a Bills fan... why would you want to be? And of course, glad im not a Patsies fan... then I'd be a cheater.
     
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  7. Dec 29, 2009 #7
    mroz

    mroz Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I am glad I am not a Patriots, Bills, Jets fan cause they all suck coconut balls.
     
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  8. Dec 29, 2009 #8
    vt_dolfan

    vt_dolfan Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Im glad Im not a Jets fan.....

    Need I say more?
     
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  9. Dec 29, 2009 #9
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    disagree completley that the patriots are regressing. dunno how anyone can say that.....they pretty much the same tough schedule as us....they win another afc east title.....they could win what 12 games? 11 games? again.

    they have a billion high draft picks coming up, tom brady, bill belichek, jarrod mayo, merriwether, guyton etc etc

    i think its wishful thinking to believe the patriots wont be challenging us every season for the next 3-5 years.....jmo of course
     
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  10. Dec 29, 2009 #10
    Paul 13

    Paul 13 Chaotic Neutral & Unstable Genius Staff Member

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    I understand putting Brady and Bellichick in the same sentence, but Mayo, Merriweather and Guyton?

    Are you saying you're not glad you're not a Pats fan? :tongue2:
     
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  11. Dec 29, 2009 #11
    adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    I'm glad I'm not a Jets fan since you have to eat alot of paint chips as a kid and I understand those arent good for your development
     
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  12. Dec 29, 2009 #12
    Anonymous

    Anonymous Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    If you think about, they are going to have a high first round draft pick in 2011. Maybe even top 5 because the Raiders are bad. That pick could be Tom Brady's replacemant, Jake Locker or Christian Ponder.
     
  13. Dec 29, 2009 #13
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    ****ing burn!
     
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  14. Dec 29, 2009 #14
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    ill take mayo with a broken leg over our dog **** LBs

    merriweather as well
     
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  15. Dec 29, 2009 #15
    dolfan7171

    dolfan7171 Well-Known Member

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    I'm glad I am not a Jets fan because they suck!! Need I say more??
     
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  16. Dec 29, 2009 #16
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    eh cant say that, when they are probably going to the playoffs.
     
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  17. Dec 29, 2009 #17
    Vengeful Odin

    Vengeful Odin Norse Mod

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    Whoa whoa whoa.

    Are you saying move Merriweather to linebacker? That makes about as much sense as moving Zach Thomas to safety.
     
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  18. Dec 29, 2009 #18
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    meaning merriweather over our safetys as well


    sheesh...dumb vikings :no:
     
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  19. Dec 29, 2009 #19
    Conuficus

    Conuficus Premium Member Luxury Box

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    Well away from here
    The Patriots have not drafted exceptionally over the past few years. They get a good deal of praise, but in reality they haven't. If you really look at who they have drafted and their impact, they haven't been hitting home runs a great deal.
     
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  20. Dec 29, 2009 #20
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    yeah the patsies should hire that conuficus guy to do their drafting for them ......
     
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  21. Dec 29, 2009 #21
    adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    PLEASE STOP BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING GOOD ABOUT THE BILLS! GIVE A GUY A RADIO SHOW AND ALL OF A SUDDEN HE TRIES TO PROVE HE'S OBJECTIVE :tongue2:
     
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  22. Dec 29, 2009 #22
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    you can when they are going they way they are going. :lol:
     
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  23. Dec 29, 2009 #23
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    arent we a team hoping 4 teams lose so we can go to the playoffs?! come on man......everyone wants to go to the dance. regardless of how.
     
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  24. Dec 29, 2009 #24
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    [​IMG]
     
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  25. Dec 29, 2009 #25
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    yeah but I wouldnt say that makes us deserving of it. you are confusing desire with what it actually is. It is what it is.
     
  26. Dec 29, 2009 #26
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    eh.....they win the superbowl (they wont) they wont put a asterisks next to it......making it is making it. in the playoffs everyone is 0-0
     
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  27. Dec 29, 2009 #27
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    if they win the super bowl obviously they were deserving. that switches where they are now, which is a team walking into the playoffs due to playing second stringers vs what they can possibly become, although not likely.
     
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  28. Dec 29, 2009 #28
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    agreed. but it doesnt matter how you get there. its getting there

    /end yogi berra language
     
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  29. Dec 29, 2009 #29
    unluckyluciano

    unluckyluciano For My Hero JetsSuck

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    no but i can still say you got ****ing lucky.


    /end that girl from last night after I passed out.
     
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  30. Dec 29, 2009 #30
    adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    whats with your facial hair fetish? every picture, sig or avatar you have now has some guy with facial hair. is it time for hockey playoffs or something?
     
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  31. Dec 29, 2009 #31
    SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    you'll find out...
     
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  32. Dec 29, 2009 #32
    adamprez2003

    adamprez2003 Senior Member

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    :couch::escape:
     
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  33. Dec 29, 2009 #33
    NoCalFinFan

    NoCalFinFan ALLLLRIGHT MIAMI!!!

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    The Cheatriots collapse has started. Bellicheat going for it on every other 4th down shows the desperation. I'm going to love seeing the Boston media rip them apart when they lose that Wild Card round game.
     
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  34. Dec 29, 2009 #34
    anlgp

    anlgp ↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A

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    I'm glad I'm not a:

    Steelers
    Patriots
    Jets
    Bills
    Texans
    Niners
    Red Wings
    Penguins

    fan.
     
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  35. Dec 30, 2009 #35
    2socks

    2socks Rebuilding Since 1973

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    I'm glad I'm not a Jets fan cause if i was I probably would be the fireman's son and I understand he is going thru ball rub training now at the ripe old age of 6.

    Seems that ball sack has to be pretty callused to last 3 hours of rubbing without significant damage:yes:
     
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  36. Dec 30, 2009 #36
    Frumundah Finnatic

    Frumundah Finnatic U Mad Miami?

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    I am glad I am not a Bills or Steeler's fan for thr following reason: Those teams could not score a touchdown against Cleveland.
     
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  37. Dec 30, 2009 #37
    Paul 13

    Paul 13 Chaotic Neutral & Unstable Genius Staff Member

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    curious as to why the Houston Texans?
     
  38. Dec 30, 2009 #38
    anlgp

    anlgp ↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A

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    cuz we can't beat the bastards :lol:

    once we beat them they'll be removed from the list
     
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  39. Dec 30, 2009 #39
    Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    Hee. hee.

    I'm glad I'm not a Jets fan.

    Or else I wouldn't be able to string together coherent sentences, my knuckles would drag when I walked, I'd have a crush on that fat pig "Snookie" from "The Jersey Shore", I wouldn't possess the ability to only have one portion with dinner, and I'd lack the self-discipline to not beerfart in front of my date.
     
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  40. Dec 30, 2009 #40
    anlgp

    anlgp ↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A

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    you'll notice the penguins are last on the list. truth be told even though they're not even in the same conference i'm still pissed more at the red wings because they swept us so many years ago.

    as far as the jets fan thing is concerned.. i have more than one portion with dinner :lol:
     
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