Hello. I am Miguel and i served in the second Gulf war. I should not be alive. I watched as 3 of my platoon mmates were killed under my Nose. One Guy Was stabbed to death by an Terrorist i watched as he cried for his mother.. I Have also Killed A man. iI have not had a goood nights sleep since i saw the soldier get stabbed i can often her his voice at night.. I tried to save him but i was too late and never forgave myself He screamed Help me Help me He is killing me.. Screaming in Pain. I returned to the states and i never got over it. My childhood was pretty Bad i moved around a total of 28 Times in my childhood and moved to 3 diffrent countries, I was Born i The states Lived in Canada USA and venezuela. My mom was involved with an abusive alchoholic Boy friend and was married to a man Who Hit her like 3 diffrent times. My mother told me she hated me after i went to THE USMC. She yelled and screamed at me beat me until i was 13 years old. She sent me to live with my Father in venezuela. she almost ruined my High school years i did not know a lick of spanish when she sent me.. Anyway when i got back to the states every one called me a hero.. I never verbally expressed this but.... I cant take them calling me a hero. some of the things i saw they werent things to be proud of After the war i was diagnoed with TSD Tramuatic stress disorder and my life has been an emotional wreck.. Just wanted to express that see if i feel better
Thank you for serving our great nation. Please take advantage of any and all of the medical programs available to our veterans to help you cope with your situation. We (civilian America) owe our freedom to the men and women of the United States Armed Forces, past and present, without you folks where would the rest of us be? Whether or not you consider yourself a hero, most of us civilians still see you and yours as heroes, don't take offense to it, it's a sign of our appreciation.
Thank you Miguel for your service and for trusting us enough to share your story here. This is a place where you will be strongly supported and affirmed. Some here have been in combat, others as first responders have witnessed death up close and personal. My experiance is as a hospital chaplain, parish pastor, and emergency response chaplain. I have been face to face with death many, many times. It is a scary and awesome thing. It appears clear from your story that the diagnosis of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) is accurate. Most returning combat veterans have it in one form or another. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! That is true of this war and frankly has been my experiance from dealing with veterans all the way back to WW I. I am sure it goes back further but I haven't personally met the folks. (people only think I'm old enough to remember the civil war but it isn't quite true!) The best treatment of this comes from others who have been through it. It is one of the main reasons veteran's organizations were formed in the first place. If you are still in service, check what programs are available within your unit. If you are out check with the VA or your local county veteran's services folks. You might find a local pastor who is an ex-chaplain and has experiance helping guys like you. If you pm me a local address I can try through my contacts to help you locate someone like that if you wish. Miguel, again I say to you, you are not alone. What happened to you was horrible and you will carry it the rest of your life. But there are ways to learn how to carry those memories in ways that are not self-destructive. Be careful of alchohol and "self-medications", they only mask the problems in the short term and often turn out to be counter productive in the long term. Get the help you need marine and know we are here to support you!
Thank you for this.. Unfortunatley i am living in Venezuela. They Hate Americans. i doubt i will find any one who can help me here.. I have wanted to go Back to the states and sign up for another Tour. Thank you for your support
Were you born in the States? I would think that in Venezuela, even if they are not so 'pro-American' you could find a doctor that cares more about your health, mental and physical, than he does politics. What ever the case may be you're in my thoughts and prayers bro. Any reason you don't come back to the states?
That is going to make getting you the help you need harder. I wonder though since it is US Marines who guard the embassy, is there any way to connect with some of those people? Strange as it sounds, perhaps coming back for another tour would be theraputic? The resources of your unit and comrades who have shared experiances is a good place to start the healing process. You are in my prayers
Thank you Guys.. I could not come Back to the states because my Grandfather died And he was from Venezuela.. My grandfather was a Navy Corpsman in WWII He lived in the states as well and was really the only one who understood the decision to go to war.. I was Born in Venezuela But Raised in FLorida Miami I have been living here to support my family in these times My Grandafther called me the venezuelan Ira Hayes before i left
I have heard that before i might give that a try since the Colombian dollar is worth more than the Venezuelan Bolivar it could cost More.I wanted to work at the US military Base in colombia but i want to live in the US NOT IN S AMERICA
I can't help you sir with any of this because I don't honestly know much about this but I wish you the best and want to thank you for what you've done for the country. Keep us updated! Alen
I honestly wish I had answers for you Miguel, but I honestly don't. As has been mentioned by others, I owe you in the highest regards. My family could not enjoy the freedom we do without your sacrifice. Obviously Pastor Keith has offered some good advise, and trust me, you can trust him. He is also a hero of sorts, he just works a little differently. I do offer my support and open ears. Drop in here and update as much or little as you like. We are all here for you, and perhaps collectively we can help you find a path to prosperity.
Yes Hey Guys im going to Be going in to Colombia once a month to take therapy its cheaper there.. I am still thinking about signing up for a second tour
If you have PTSD I would recommend you see a therapist and see what they say about doing another tour. If the time comes and for whatever reason you haven't seen a therapist I suggest you do what you feel is right. Having said that I hope you feel better and get what you need to have taken care of done as soon as possible.
Congrats, that is a great start. You are being proactive for yourself. That suggests you should be a very good candidate for therapy. Keep at it Marine and best wishes. You go with my prayers. Stay in touch here and let us know how you are doing, OK?
Hermano, I can't ever imagine what you have gone through or are going through but I want to thank you for your service to our country. As stated earlier, without your "heroic" efforts (you are a hero) and those of others, our country would not be where it is today. Pastor Keith is a great resource for prayers and guidance. He has helped me on more than one occasion. Lean on us here if you need to. We consider ourselves family here no matter how long you have been a member of this site. You have my prayers and blessings. GB
Having been there twice myself, I couldn't agree more. No one knows better how to handle all of this better then those who are doing it every day. I'm glad to hear this. Keep us informed. Time will help pass some of your thoughts and visions.
Agreed with the consensus brother Miguel (Any chance I can call you Micky?). It is good you are proactively looking into things that will help you down lifes path. Therapy is a great thing for so many reasons. Not having to shoulder the burdeon alone, and it should help open up other avenues for you. Keep us in touch as you can brother
What platoon/battalion were you in? Where were you stationed in Iraq? What did you do overthere, your MOS. Im sorry Devildog, but your story sounds very far fetched to be honest.
Yeah i Called the Guy he lives in Bogota His name is Doctor Manuel rodriguez. i Will see him on NOVEMBER 15
i actually thought the same thing... But I figured I'd let it be. If someone is THAT desperate for attention, they could have it.
