While I was doing my bed check last night, one of you linemen asked me "which way to the fire escape?" So, this is a diagram of how to get there. Please remember to proceed in a single file and in an orderly fashion should there be an actual fire. Just make sure to let Pouncey and Albert go first okay?
"Damn it guys. Which one of you drew up this creative and effective play? That is NOT the Dolphins way and you know it. Now go pick up trash off the ground in the training facility, BUT DO IT LIKE I SHOWED YOU HOW TO DO IT! And I want you to run there so...GO, GO!"
This is today's connect-the-dots puzzle boys...whoever finishes it fastest gets to play Center today!
"Guys, this is a floor plan of our locker room. Please note the areas in which I found discarded candy wrappers and tape. This is unacceptable, and it always seems to be coming from your area. I will definitely be talking to the leadership council about this."
The quarterback he fakes to left, no no no he fakes to the right! No he doesn't fake...he thinks about faking! He pretends to fake! I don't know where I am.
"I think I have a way out of this. We, uh, call the police, and we have 'em send over one of their sketch artists. And Mr Brybricker can give a description. We can put up "Wanted" posters all over the forum.... "Have you seen this argument?... Report immediately to Mr Big Brybricker! Do not attempt to apprehend this argument, as it thinks it's armed and dangerous! It was last seen hanging out in the POFO forum at ThePhins.com."
O.K., guys gather around, this is the only play I understand, so pay attention. First, tackle you have a wham block here, right guard, a cut block here, then you double back and pick up the guy our backup center missed, left guard push you're guy to left,.....no, sorry the right.....no wait, just push him o.k., just push him for now, then pick up the first moving target you can find, but remember it has to be a guy on the other team. Left tackle, you let your guy get up the field and then shield him off creating a seal hear. Now, remember that this all happens when the ball is snapped.
- To show he is serious about weeding out non-high character players, Coach Joe Philbin is requiring each player to complete an ink blot test. No. 62 Evan Finkenberg thinks he sees "a job at Staples."