1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

This sucks!

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by steveincolorado, Mar 7, 2014.

  1. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    I got a jury summons for next week. I really hope they tell me that my services are not needed. Ive gotten out of 2 others before, but third time is a charm.....right? One girl I work with told me that its my civil duty to go, cant tell you what I told her...LOL.
    I'm tryong to come up with a excuse to get out of it, but I doubt they'll acept anything. If they tell me to come in, I might have to go buy a "I love Russia" tee shirt or get one that says "Showden, a true hero"...LOL

    I really dont want to sit in some court room listening to the jackass lawyer preach to me.

    Any thoughts?
     
  2. Bpk

    Bpk Premium Member Luxury Box

    Reminds me of a story from freshman year in college…. (yes, it thusly involves sex)….


    All of the Sophs who were in charge of "Frosh Week" had nicknames on their shirt. One particularly hot girl's nickname was "Tame Me" and her real name was Tammy.


    Well, theories abounded as to why this was her nickname. Finally, some fresh-out-of-highschool kid got drunk enough to straight-out ask her. She turned red and walked away. I'm guessing she didn't pick the name that went on her T-shirt. lol.


    Anyways, we started asking other Sophs and it turns out, in her freshman year, during frosh week she had hooked up with the head Soph. That's pretty unremearkable, and that head Soph definitely had good taste if shaky morals.


    But the story doesn't end there (of course). It turns out that Tammy and this guy hooking up was a moment people had been waiting to see happen, so when they did finally retire to his bedroom there was a sizeable audience listening outside at the door.


    Apparently, they heard the two of them starting to have sex and getting very loud and vocal… him groaning a lot, and then….

    ...very clearly she begins to yell

    "DO YOUR DUTY!!!! DO!!! YOUR!!!! DUTYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! "


    Over and over again to the cadence of humpitude.

    The legend of Tammy the wild **** was born, and "Do Your Duty" was a phrase she heard through the rest of college.

    So, Steve.. the lesson is do. Your. DUTY!!!!!!!!!
     
    Fin-Omenal likes this.
  3. NaboCane

    NaboCane Banned

    31,949
    11,899
    0
    Nov 24, 2007
    I sat in a Federal jury in the eighties, on a bank robbery trial. It was so open-and-shut, it only took 3.5 days.

    But because of it, I was exposed to amazing forensic techniques many years before CSI came along and showed the rest of the world what amazing things could be done to catch dumbasses like the defendant, who went by the nickname "G-Money."
     
    TiP54 and steveincolorado like this.
  4. Unlucky 13

    Unlucky 13 Team Raheem Club Member

    51,927
    63,005
    113
    Apr 24, 2012
    Troy, Virginia
    I've only been called for Jury duty once, but thankfully, because I literally live on the fringe edge of the area covered by the court, and worked 50 miles in the opposite direction even farther, I was eliminated as a candidate easily. Good luck.
     
    steveincolorado likes this.
  5. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

    72,252
    43,684
    113
    Nov 27, 2007
    It is your civic duty. The jury system is one of the single greatest things about this country and without it the US would fall apart.
     
  6. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    Wear a helmet and show up wearing only a stained wife-beater and some windbreaker pants (straight commando). You don't have to drink but show up smelling of alcohol; maybe spill some liquor on yourself in the parking lot (let it dry).

    Also do you have enough time to grow a mullet?

    In any event, be sure to tell the lawyers during selection that you can pick out a guilty guy just by looking at him. That you're very efficient; absolutely no evidence necessary.
     
  7. ToddPhin

    ToddPhin Premium Member Luxury Box Club Member

    42,442
    24,982
    113
    Jul 6, 2012
    NC
    In the middle of jury selection just start screaming out, "Can I push for the death penalty in this case?!"
     
  8. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    Very audibly whisper "Payback's a ***** mother****er" over and over. Do this slowly. And feel free to tremble some; don't blink.

    Sent from my Transformer TF101 using Tapatalk 4
     
  9. VanDolPhan

    VanDolPhan Club member Club Member

    13,057
    8,875
    113
    Nov 26, 2007
    Hamilton, Ontario Canada
    [video=youtube;bBuNvyo4j54]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBuNvyo4j54[/video]
     
  10. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    That's only your opinion, in my opinion, it's not my civil duty. I think it's unfair to make me do their work for under min wage. If your so incline, you can take my spot. I know several people enjoy jury duty, but I have no interest in it.
     
  11. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    I've been told twice that my services were not needed, in two different states, hoping that come Tuesday night, they tell me that again.
     
  12. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

    72,252
    43,684
    113
    Nov 27, 2007
    Jury duty being an American citizen's duty is not a matter of opinion. It is fact that it is.

    You don't want to do it, but that has no bearing on it being your duty as a citizen or not. In fact, its a typical human characteristic to say something they don't like is not a fact.
     
  13. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    It's not a fact and what your saying is only your opinion. By your logic, I should start voting because that's my civic duty? I don't vote because all the people in politics are scum bags and I want no part of being linked to them.
     
  14. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    I should have the freedom to choose whether I accept jury duty or not. On a side note, judges and lawyers are getting full pay, so why do they pay peanuts to the jury?
     
  15. Just tell them you do not want to be there and if they force you to do it then you are going to vote not guilty to waste there time too. They wont pick you
     
  16. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

    72,252
    43,684
    113
    Nov 27, 2007
    You're confusing things.

    It is your civic duty but you can choose not to do it. You should want to vote and you should want to do jury duty, they are both cornerstones of this country.....but you can get out of doing both and that doesn't make either one less of a civic duty.

    lol. Cause there are no problems that could come from paying jurors serious wages.....:pity:
     
  17. VanDolPhan

    VanDolPhan Club member Club Member

    13,057
    8,875
    113
    Nov 26, 2007
    Hamilton, Ontario Canada
    Simple. Up here I don't register to vote so I don't get called in for jury duty. Which is ironic cause I did a stint working Security at the city courthouse ;p
     
    MikeHoncho likes this.
  18. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    Just to be clear, it's not just about the pay. I just flat out don't care and I don't want to be there. In Colorado, your employer pays your first 3 days, after that the court system (not sure where) pays you 50 bucks a day.
     
  19. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    I've never in my life have registered to vote, but I've still been summoned 3 times. Just because you don't register doesn't mean you won't get the call.

    But that is the US of A
     
  20. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

    10,191
    4,187
    113
    Dec 3, 2007
    Bradenton,FL
    Did they just send you a letter in the mail? Or certified that you had to sign?
     
  21. Unlucky 13

    Unlucky 13 Team Raheem Club Member

    51,927
    63,005
    113
    Apr 24, 2012
    Troy, Virginia
    I remembered that I had a friend in college who was called for jury duty in his home state, hundreds of miles away. Apparently, that didn't matter to the court and they made a huge stink about it, threatening to send the cops and bring him back. It didn't come to that, but it was rediculous that being a student doesn't automatically exempt you, since missing class could lead to failure, let alone attending a school in a different state from the one on your driver's liscense.
     
  22. muscle979

    muscle979 Season Ticket Holder

    15,863
    6,275
    113
    Dec 12, 2007
    Evans, GA
    I sat on a civil trial back in November for three days. Maybe I'm crazy but I really enjoyed it. Some dude had been running about 90 or so on a motorcycle in a 45 zone, came over the crest of a hill, and then ended up hitting an old man turning left in his car. He was lucky he lived through it. He was suing the old man for damages and such. The defense had some pretty cool forensic work done and all of the evidence ended up overwhelmingly showing that the motorcycle guy was driving extremely recklessly. The old man started making the turn with the reasonable expectation that nobody was down the hill coming towards him at 90 or better. There was also some pretty cool calculations presented showing that the motorcycle could have stopped ahead of the collision it would have been going even close to 45 mph. Needless to say we didn't give the plaintiff ****.

    That was the third time I had been summoned here in only about three years and some change. The first time they didn't even end up needing me to go to the courthouse. The second time I was out of the country so they made me come back a few months later for the one last November. It's weird because in several years I was never summoned in Florida or Georgia.
     
  23. Den54

    Den54 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

    19,677
    31,341
    113
    Nov 23, 2007
    AMERICA!
    Just show up high.
    It's legal right?:shifty:
     
  24. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    I had to serve for a similar case. There was a lot more semen evidence involved though.
     
    McLovin, muscle979 and bigbry like this.
  25. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

    9,775
    5,149
    113
    May 7, 2008
    North Cacalaka
    you only have to give them a sample if they ask you for it. stop offering it to people.
     
  26. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    That'd just be rude.

    Sent from my LG-MS770 using Tapatalk 4 Beta
     
  27. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

    9,775
    5,149
    113
    May 7, 2008
    North Cacalaka
    don't act like its a beverage.
     
  28. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    It's got electrolytes
     
    McLovin likes this.
  29. McLovin

    McLovin Resident Pats fan.

    9,775
    5,149
    113
    May 7, 2008
    North Cacalaka
    Rotates fingers as I say that.

    Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk
     
  30. steveincolorado

    steveincolorado Spook, Storme & Pebbles

    11,511
    3,069
    113
    Mar 23, 2008
    Colorado
    SOB, just found out I have to go report tomorrow.....this ****ing sucks!!
     
  31. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

    52,652
    25,565
    113
    Nov 13, 2009
    Keep your wits about you. If you can, bring a gavel with you and when asked by the jury selection panel, insist that you should be a juror because you "voted for Bush, both times".
     
  32. bigbry

    bigbry Huge Member

    5,278
    3,071
    0
    Dec 18, 2008
    Colorado
    No worries Steve, when they ask about your felony convictions, tell the truth this time.
     
    MikeHoncho likes this.

Share This Page