"For a long time it gave me nightmares, having to witness an injustice like that. It was a constant reminder of how cruel the world can be. I can still hear them taunting him... "Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids." ...How come they just couldn't give him some cereal?!" -Carlton Banks
"Winning isn't everything, its the only thing." Vince Lombardi Necessity is blind until it becomes conscious. Freedom is the consciousness of necessity. Karl Marx
_They rattle their chains and boast of their freedom. Fredrick Douglass The spirit of resistance to government is so valuable that I wish it always to be kept alive Thomas Jefferson Ina sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function. We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. CS Lewis Some people try to see things in this game that do not exist, football is blocking and tackling. V Lombardi Give me your four year olds and in a generation I will build a socialist state. VI Lenin I can't give you brains, but I can give you a diploma The Wizard of Oz.
Yogi Berra Quotes I love them. # "This is like deja vu all over again." # "You can observe a lot just by watching." # "He must have made that before he died." -- Referring to a Steve McQueen movie. # "I want to thank you for making this day necessary." -- On Yogi Berra Appreciation Day in St. Louis in 1947. # "I'd find the fellow who lost it, and, if he was poor, I'd return it." -- When asked what he would do if he found a million dollars. # "Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?" # "You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there." # "I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early." # "If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else." # "If you can't imitate him, don't copy him." # "You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six." # "Baseball is 90% mental -- the other half is physical." # "It was impossible to get a conversation going; everybody was talking too much." # "Slump? I ain't in no slump. I just ain't hitting." # "A nickel isn't worth a dime today." # "Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded." # "It gets late early out there." -- Referring to the bad sun conditions in left field at the stadium. # "Glen Cove." -- Referring to Glenn Close on a movie review television show. # Once, Yogi's wife Carmen asked, "Yogi, you are from St. Louis, we live in New Jersey, and you played ball in New York. If you go before I do, where would you like me to have you buried?" Yogi replied, "Surprise me." # "Do you mean now?" -- When asked for the time. # "I take a two hour nap, from one o'clock to four." # "If you come to a fork in the road, take it." # "You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn't enough in the second half you give what's left." # "90% of the putts that are short don't go in." # "I made a wrong mistake." # "Texas has a lot of electrical votes." -- During an election campaign, after George Bush stated that Texas was important to the election. # "Thanks, you don't look so hot yourself." -- After being told he looked cool. # "I always thought that record would stand until it was broken." # "Yeah, but we're making great time!" -- In reply to "Hey Yogi, I think we're lost." # "If the fans don't come out to the ball park, you can't stop them." # "Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel." # "It's never happened in the World Series competition, and it still hasn't." # "How long have you known me, Jack? And you still don't know how to spell my name." -- Upon receiving a check from Jack Buck made out to "bearer." # "I'd say he's done more than that." -- When asked if first baseman Don Mattingly had exceeded expectations for the current season. # "The other teams could make trouble for us if they win." # "He can run anytime he wants. I'm giving him the red light." -- On the acquisition of fleet Ricky Henderson. # "I never blame myself when I'm not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn't my fault that I'm not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?" # "It ain't the heat; it's the humility." # "The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase." # "You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours." # "I didn't really say everything I said."
"Chivalry is dead, and women killed it." - Dave Chapelle I could post about a million quotes from his standup.
"Gun store, liquor store,Gun store, liquor store,Gun store, liquor store,hey man you are taking me to the hood!"
"I was standin in line at the grocery store and I looked over at a Cosmo magazine. It said 100 ways to please your man. Bulll****, there aint no 100 ways, that ****t is 4 things long. Suck his dikk, play with his balls, fix him a sandwich and dont talk too much."
Dave Chapelle on Sesame Street "They got a character on there named Oscar, they treat this guy like **** the entire show. They judge him right in his face, "Oscar you are so mean! Isn't he kids?", "Yeah Oscar! Your a grouch!", its like "BITTCH! I LIVE IN A ****** TRASHCAN!" "Then they had the nerve to put a pimp on there. Now, they didn't go out and say he was a pimp. I know a pimp when I see one. They called him, "The Count". He had a cape on and everything. On the show you see him pimping. "Bittch, where is my money. You've been late 4 times, I've been counting. How many times must I smack you before you act right. "*Smack*One, *Smack*Two, Two smacks, ha,ha,ha,ha,ha." "Who'd wana live in a neighborhood like that? 6 foot pigeons walkin around and shiit. Junkie elephants walkin around."
I was watchin Killin Em Softly earlier which is one of his stand ups but if you go to youtube and search it youll find some great stuff.
As I explained to others, when you pay top dollar, you can get Spitzer's girl to do ANYTHING. Besides, that is what goes on at www.finhell.com We pull dolphins news out of anywhere...
(looks it up FOR unlucky) Here you go champ, we will work on bigger words soon. 1. a figure of speech in which a term or phrase is applied to something to which it is not literally applicable in order to suggest a resemblance, as in “A mighty fortress is our God.” Compare mixed metaphor, simile (def. 1). 2. something used, or regarded as being used, to represent something else; emblem; symbol.
Im was able to meet yogi too! got an autograph from him and don Larson! great moment to actually talk to him!