I suck with women...

Yes Lucky you are so very, very tall. Who's the big boy, who's the big boy? That's right you are.

Yes, I do as a matter of fact, can I borrow your jumper cables...

 

Sweet! You get a freebie?

 

In the land of the blind, the man with one eye is King.

 

We all have our ideas of how a woman should or should not act. Some guys think that an aggressive woman = ****.

Not true.

Personally, I like it when a woman comes on to me. It makes it easier for me to come on her, I mean, come on to her!

Opie is wise beyond his 5 years. Listen to him, he speaks the truth.

More often than not, they want us MORE than we want them! You need to believe it, 'cause it's true.

 

Mr Section411 always says that being a **** is not a character flaw.

 

I would advise to just go with it. Even if they were messing with you, you'll never know unless you give the digits. If you aren't comfortable with that, give them your email address. Before I got married, I used to find that women aren't comfortable about giving their numbers out most of the time...But, they are much more comfortable giving out the email address. You could give the email address or Myspace/facebook info out and if they are messing with you, you can block them. If they are not, then you arrange a date and go from there.

 

Only the ones that drive cross-country (while wearing a diaper) to kill your new girlfirend.

 

i have learned one thing in my life, and that is, women despise me. Whatever I do, do the opposite such as the following:

1) staring for long periods of time at their sisters.
2) giving them my phone number, then yelling at them for calling me too late.
3) staring for long periods of time at their mothers.
4) telling them your 2007 chevy broke down, and you need to use theirs.

and so on.

 

I wish I learned that years before I did.

 

Next time you see these girls, wave to them and see how they react.

 

Chicks hitting on a guy restocking shelves at a Publix are either A.) Desperate B.) Sluts or C.) All of the above

 

They could have been really down to earth girls who have checked him out before and finally had the balls to say hi.

 

and I could sprout wings and fly...................

 

this is the root of your hole problem right here. you have no swag, get you some.

stories like this should help boost your swag, but you dont let it because of the fact that your shocked instead of just taking it in. every single time a girl tells me im cute or sexy, my head gets bigger and bigger(yes both of them). which is a good thing. the more i can look in the mirror and know im one good looking mother****er and girls want my thing, in or around their mouths, the more chicks i pull. girls love confidence. next time your around some chicks, act like you **** $100 bills...

 

Sounds to me like somebody's a little jealous...

Not to be rude, but you're 17 years old and you don't know the first thing about women.

And how would I know you that don't know about women? Because you're 17 years old.

 

"It's a bird..."

"It's a plane..."

"Mommy, why is that flying sombrero throwing empty bottles of tequila and cursing at us?"

 

or

"well the funny thing about the stuffing is its located on my ****!"

super bad...yes i did reference it in back to back posts..

 

well i know plenty about women, and I can tell you, they hate when you check out their sisters, and dont check out baggers at a publix

 

and? whats the problem here? those are the best kinds of things.

 

You guys are something else. I would be insulted if I was the OP.

You're intimating that becuase he stocks shelves at Publix, he is not deserving or capable of having "decent" women hit on him.

He's a 20 year old kid, and there's nothing wrong with a 20 year old stocking shelves.

 

I'm just messing around dude. Good for him, hes gotten further then I have

 

Nevermind lucky, he's just bitter because he isn't deserving of decent women or a job at Publix.

 

Now THAT'S comedy!

 

I know where youre coming from UCF. As a former Publix employee i had numerous occations where I, completely unexpectedly, had an opportunity to get some #s. Sometimes I was focused and was able to get them, but other times i was just like you, nervous and completely out of it. When you work for Publix you get sucked into whatever it is youre doing. I dont know if its the muzak they play in the store that warps you or the nazi management that constantly monitors what youre doing so you stay focused. Not to mention while youre in your doofy uniform you dont expect to have any opportunities to land a girl's number. But heres some advice: screw it. Next time you have the opporunity and the chick is a 6 or better, you best do what you can to get that number, as long as you dont act like a jackass. Even if you think theyre messing with you, it couldnt hurt, and anyway, it makes for entertainment while you work and will be a great story to brag about later. So, dont be so shy, and make sure youre aisle is blocked.

 

1) They usually have money.
2) They are a lot closer to the gave than you.
3) With the lights off.....scratch that, and just go with one and two.

 

blue light special

 

Next time they ask you what your name is, say "Dirty Sanchez".

Look at the bright side UCF, you now have 2 weeks worth of angry masturbation imagining what you could have done to them.

 

omg. i worked at a kmart too. the one that hit on me had red hair!

 

K-Mart special?
Red hair, 6 tats, droopy ****, saggy *** and three kids following her looking for their baby daddy?

 

Then it makes sense that they came on to you.

Just have more confidence in that. You'll be fine.

 

**** you E!!!

 

No, it was basically offered but thats not me.

 

how 3 shots and you blew it, no biggie though I've blown missed signals before, just not ones that obvious.


My advice:

1) Be confident
2) make them laugh
3) when in doubt, whip it out.

Having a scar would helps support the BS.

 

I once asked a girl if she wanted to dance and when she put her nose up at me and said no, I said, no, really you look really fat in those pants.

 

that's really telling her E! WAY TO GO

...now where's that darn sarcasm smiley