How old is Grandpa?

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Pagan, Feb 24, 2010.

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  1. Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    Stay with this - the answer is at the end - and it will blow you away.

    One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events. The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.

    The granddad replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill. There was no radar, credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens. Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and man hadn't yet walked on the moon.

    Your grandmother and I got married first-and then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, 'Sir'-and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'Sir.'

    We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy. Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense. We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.

    We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent. Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins. Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started. Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends not purchasing condominiums.

    We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings. We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

    If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk. The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam. Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of. We had 5 & 10 cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards .

    You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600 but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon. In my day, 'grass' was mowed, 'coke' was a cold drink, 'pot' was something your mother cooked in, and 'rock music' was your grandmother's lullaby. 'Aids' were helpers in the Principal's office, 'chip' meant a piece of wood, 'hardware' was found in a hardware store, and 'software' wasn't even a word.

    And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap. ...”

    “Wow Grandpa,” said the boy, “How old are you?”

    “I’m 64 son…..I’m 64.”
     
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  2. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    2010-64 = 1946

    The first electric dryer was developed in the 1940's. Group therapy was used not long after WWII. The US had day cares back in the 1850's. A domestic dishwasher was available in the 20's, and one with electric drying elements in the 40's. Penicillin was discovered in 1928. Radar was "invented" by 1936. Contact lenses were available at least as early as 1936. Ballpoint pens first went on sale in 1945.

    Sounds like Grandpa has a case of Alzheimer's. :shifty:
     
  3. jetssuck

    jetssuck I hear Mandich's voice...

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    Doesn't say when this was written..... :shifty:
     
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  4. SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    and the kid said "you know that tv you fall asleep watching all day, that hearing aid you need to hear, that high-tech made medicine you need to live, the new light weight metal walker and cane thats easier to handle with your arthritist....and that sweet hover-round you use to move everywhere you go?............you're welcome."
     
  5. GridIronKing34

    GridIronKing34 Silently Judging You

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    Nah, he said "Pipe down or I'll put you in a nursing home..."
     
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  6. late again

    late again Senior Member

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    Nonetheless, a fun little read.
    All the rest aside my dad listened to Tommy Dorsey, Benny Goodman and all that big band stuff. He would be in his eighties if he were still alive. :dunno:
     
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  7. Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    You know what's really scary?

    That you actually took the time to go look all that **** up.

    Get a life bro...get a life. :tongue2: :lol:
     
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  8. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    It took like 5 mins. :lol:
     
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  9. jetssuck

    jetssuck I hear Mandich's voice...

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    Stitches?

    ........more like "Stickler"
     
  10. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    You're just upset because you're so close to "Grandpa's" age. :tongue2:
     
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  11. Frumundah Finnatic

    Frumundah Finnatic U Mad Miami?

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    LOL fogies and their bag full of suck.
     
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  12. Sethdaddy8

    Sethdaddy8 Well-Known Member

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    bah, in my day...there was no internet. when you didn't know something...TOUGH! ya stayed dumb. and there was no megans law. ya hoped the guy offerin ya free candy wouldn't show ya his willy. sometimes it went okay...sometimes...you were the kid who lived on Franklin St. Oh, Billy...poor poor Billy.
     
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  13. GISH

    GISH ~mUST wARN oTHERS~

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    if grandpa doesnt like it. he can get out. or maybe grandson needs to take grandpa to the imax to see avatar, and then kick grandpas *** at madden on his 62" flat panel HDTV. grandpa better invest in some Depends, cuz he's gonna **** himself.
     
  14. jetssuck

    jetssuck I hear Mandich's voice...

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    So skippy and you other jitterbugs.....how many SB's have you seen the Dolphins win? Any undefeated seasons?

    No?.......dang :shifty:
     
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